Archive

political sewer

About Last Night…

By
November 7, 2012
political sewer
Leave a Comment

I don’t vote, which means last night is the most positive night of the year for me. I get to be a cheer on the winners and console the losers from last night’s elections, which means i go on facebook and “like” the shit out of everybody!

Why? i want everyone to come together as a nation in those moments and recognize that we are not different, but exactly the same in how ridiculous we all are.

here are some highlights: (names deleted)

DEMOCRATS: 

 

 

 

 

 

Aw, that’s sweet. humanity for all! except a week ago she posted this:

 

This hurricane, if you may not have known, killed hundreds of people and left millions without power and gas and is still wreaking havoc. humanity!

Read More

2012: Judgment Cometh

By
February 18, 2012
political sewer
Leave a Comment

Currently, the Supreme Court’s conservative bloc has a 5-4 majority.  With three Justices turning 80 this year, the 2012 election could determine if conservatives or liberals will cement control in the coming decades.

Don’t worry — this won’t be a political rant.  I just want to inject more pseudo-intellectual material into TMF (similar to how I want  to eject more genetic material into Elena Heiress).

Over the next few months, they’re gonna heat things up a little in the Supreme Court of the United States:

March 2012 – President Obama’s controversial health care overhaul.

April 2012 – The Arizona crackdown on illegal immigration.

Later this year, the Court could hear a Texas affirmative action case challenging the use of race as a factor in college admissions.  Farther out, they could hear arguments on California’s Proposition 8.

If any of you jack-wads get a chance to break from your typical diet of toomuchfire.com and pornhub.com, I recommend you check out www.oyez.org, where you can see what’s going on in the Supreme Court and even listen to pod-casts of oral arguments.

americans for a better tomorrow, tomorrow

By
January 20, 2012
political sewer
Leave a Comment

So by now you’ve probably heard of Super PACs, which in non-beltway jargon, means “Self-serving millionaires/billionaires spending a shitload to money to tell you what candidate probably won’t act in your self-interest.”

Since the conservative-leaning Supreme Court’s decision on the Citizens United case, which essentially said “Corporations Are People,” this has opened the floodgates to those who talk with their wallet to effectively control the debate and fill up the airwaves with ads from groups who are not technically supposed to coordinate with candidates (yeah, right) and feature intentionally vague names like “Restore Our Future” (read: Mitt Romney, who’s PAC has so far spent $12 million to get their message out), “American Crossroads” (??) and “Faith Family Freedom Fund” (FFFffffffFFFFFFFFF). These douchey attack ads from these vague, underworld entities are probably all you’re going to see on TV for the next year, so get used to them.

But luckily, Stephen Colbert and John Stewart have come to the rescue by creating their own Super PAC as a way to make light of how ridiculous this has become. Titled “Citizens for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow,” they’ve taken to the airwaves in South Carolina with a few messages of their own.

“john mccain is acting fucking INSANE right now”

By
December 16, 2011
criminal fuckin' conspiracies, political sewer, sports / deportes, the apocalypse
Leave a Comment

Or so says Russian presidential “candidate” Vladimir Putin . . .

Let me ask you this: How are the recent flawed Duma elections tied to  The New START Treaty and the Dwight Howard trade?  Indeed, it’s an intricate web of complexities, decipherable only by a trained TMF correspondent.

“[T]he Arab Spring is coming to a neighborhood near you[!]“

From top left: U.S. President Barack Obama; New Jersey Nets owner and Independent Russian presidential candidate Mikhail Prokhorov; New Jersey Nets head coach Avery Johnson; Russian Prime Minister and United Russia presidential candidate Vladimir Putin; Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad; Orlando Magic center Dwight Howard; Russian President Dmitry  Medvedev; NBA Commissioner David Stern.

February 5, 2011: The United States of America and the Russian Federation enter into The New START (Strategic Arms Reduction Treaty) as part of the Obama administration’s plan to reset relations with Russia.

April 13, 2011: New Jersey Nets finish the 2010-2011 NBA season at 24-58.  NBA lock out appears imminent.

May 16, 2011: Nets’ owner Mikhail Prokhorov announces his plan to join the leadership of Russia’s Right Cause party.  He criticizes Russian President Dmitry Medvedev’s and Prime Minister Vladimir Putin’s tandem ruler-ship of Russia.

July 1, 2011: NBA announces lock out.

September 23, 2011: International Democrat Union suspends Right Cause’s associate member status.  Prokhorov resigns from Right Cause, indicating the party is a “puppet” organization of the Kremlin.

September 24, 2011: Dmitry Medvedev recommends the United Russia party nominate Vladimir Putin as their 2012 presidential candidate.  They do so.

November 23, 2011: Bloomberg: ‘Russia Prepares to “Destroy” U.S. Shield’; New York Times: ‘Russia Elevates Warning about U.S. Missile-Defense Plan in Europe:’

November 28, 2011: Russian state news agency: ‘Russia’s NATO Envoy to Visit China, Iran Over Missile Defense.’

December 4, 2011: Russia holds Duma parliamentary elections.  Allegations of mass fraud in favor of United Russia and Vladimir Putin are rampant.

December 7, 2011: Senator John McCain addresses his colleagues in the Senate:  He reports Dmitry Medvedev is threatening to deploy ballistic missiles to destroy U.S. missile systems in Europe.  He accuses Russia of conspiring with China and Iran to further such an aim.  He declares the New START Treaty to be a Russian blackmail device.

December 8, 2011: NBA players and owners ratify a new collective bargaining agreement.  Trade rumors involving Dwight Howard and the New Jersey Nets begin to circulate.

December 12, 2011: Prokhorov announces his candidacy for the Russian presidential office as an independent.

December 15, 2011: The Orlando Magic pull center Dwight Howard from the trade market.  New Jersey Nets head coach Avery Johnson says team plans to renew trade efforts in March of 2012.  The Russian presidential election happens to be scheduled for March 4, 2012.

December 16, 2011:  Vladimir Putin says John McCain is acting fucking INSANE right now.

NOTE: This continues to be a developing story.  Thus far, TMF has merely outlined the facts for our readers.  Further content in the way of high-pressure analysis and baseless speculation could be forthcoming.

Re: how to exterminate liberals

By
October 19, 2011
political sewer
Leave a Comment

In this scene from Nixon, Oliver Stone has the President confront his “demons” or the racist, corporate-interest, GOP boosters from the South. I think Stone intended to show they were the ones responsible for the war, national debt, unemployment, segregation and homophobia. If you take Anthony Hopkins out of this scene and replace him with Barack Obama, I think you have an idea of how cho_kettie and the Occupiers think this country must work.

Nixon would be correct nowadays if he said of the Occupiers, “[I'll] tell you what would cure them. A good, old-fashioned trip to my Ohio father’s woodshed.”

But what I still don’t understand is how the lib kids elected their dream candidate, nothing has changed, they still want to bitch, but they don’t want to bitch at him. Ah — so they bitch at some deep, dark, double-secret conspiracy contrived in a ranch-style brandy room with obnoxious buck mounts and a hellacious fire place.

What they’re really doing is taking their cue from flunky British kids who watched The Football Factory too many times and dirt-poor middle-eastern kids whose countries really are fucked up.

But hey, I’m not saying this is all bad. I’m glad to see the smart-phone generation doing their bitching on the streets rather than from the couch using Facebook.

Still, we don’t bitch in this country. We invent. We compete. And if we don’t get it our way — we sue. That’s the truth.